Chapter 1 - Sinking Husband
Ryuji was ironing his wife Kasumi's shirt, listening to the sounds coming from the television.
He wasn’t, however, a stay-at-home husband.
Ryuji had studied diligently since his student days, got into university without having to take a gap year, and landed a job at a well-known company, where he worked without any issues.
Thanks to his efforts, he was earning around six million yen annually in his twenties, and now, at thirty-two, his income was on track to exceed eight million yen. Among his colleagues, he considered himself one of the more successful.
He lived with his beloved family—his wife Kasumi and daughter Akari. He was supposed to be happy, leading a fulfilling life. However, lately, Ryuji felt a shadow darkening that happiness.
"These days, we’re really seeing a remarkable advancement for women in society, aren’t we?"
A man with a thinning hairline, whose expertise was unclear, spoke energetically on the talk show.
Watching the TV out of the corner of his eye, Ryuji moved the iron carefully to avoid leaving any creases on the shirt.
Household chores were Ryuji’s domain. When they first started living together, they had split the chores equally. But as they got married and had a child, the division gradually shifted towards Ryuji. Now, he handled nearly everything—cooking, cleaning, laundry.
The reason was simple: Kasumi earned more than he did. She hadn’t explicitly asked him to take on more, but ever since the day he learned her income had surpassed his, he’d slowly started doing more and more of the household tasks.
Otherwise, he couldn’t relax.
Kasumi was a good person. Since they had started dating, she’d never pressured him to buy designer bags or to cover her meals. At the same time, she wasn’t the type of assertive woman who saw men as adversaries. She’d always respected him.
She was someone he didn’t deserve.
Recently, Ryuji found himself often thinking about this phrase—"someone I don’t deserve"—which he had once said as a joke when they were newly married.
Was he truly worthy of being Kasumi's husband, of being Akari’s father?
Kasumi’s income kept rising.
She worked in product planning for a cosmetics company.
When she first joined, the company was small, but thanks to the success of the new products she planned, it grew into a well-known name in the industry.
Kasumi, who had greatly contributed to the rapid growth of this once-small company, was promoted to an executive position and now, at a young age, was entrusted with shaping the future of the company.
She was worlds apart from him, Ryuji thought. Though he, too, held a position in a large company, his path to promotion was straightforward: he was good at following instructions. He had risen quickly by doing exactly what was asked of him, but that rapid progress also indicated a ceiling—he would go no further.
In other words, he was destined to remain a department head. His income would not increase much from here.
Ryuji finished folding the shirt he’d ironed. Since Akari was old enough not to cry at night, he had time to do housework at night, leaving him with little more than ironing to do on weekends. But this gentle rhythm was slowly eating away at him.
Right after Akari was born, Ryuji had taken paternity leave. He wanted to support Kasumi’s return to work. Though they hadn’t exactly planned it, when Kasumi unexpectedly became pregnant, she often talked about her company while in the hospital. Ryuji knew how passionate she was about her work, so he didn’t mind taking leave.
And Akari was adorable. She cried constantly, had accidents, and it was hard to understand what was going on in her little head. But her occasional smiles, her innocent gaze, and the small sounds she made were more precious to him than anything.
Kasumi wasn’t uninvolved in parenting either. In fact, she doted on Akari even more than he did.
The three of them—he, Kasumi, and Akari—were supposed to be functioning well together.
Ryuji put away the folded shirt in the drawer and changed the TV channel. He couldn’t bear listening to the vague opinions of the so-called expert.
Recently, Akari had started elementary school. While this had added some chores, the fact that she no longer needed help with things like meals and bathroom breaks had made his life significantly easier. Doing chores while working didn’t feel as burdensome anymore.
And because of that, he found himself dwelling on trivial thoughts.
Ryuji had never had much self-confidence. As a student, he hadn’t been the center of attention, nor had he ever been popular with women, other than Kasumi.
When Kasumi, his university classmate, confessed her feelings to him, he’d thought it was some kind of mistake.
His lack of confidence lasted until Kasumi made the first move romantically, a little while after they began dating. In hindsight, it was somewhat embarrassing that he hadn’t taken the initiative.
Ryuji was self-conscious about his sweating and body odor. Since high school, after overhearing a female classmate say he smelled, he’d tried not to get too close to others, especially women.
Because of that, even after they started dating, he hadn’t held her hand until Kasumi, fed up, initiated it herself.
It was then that he started to feel a bit more self-assured. Knowing that someone could accept him, even as he was, made him more positive.
Now, that hard-won confidence was beginning to crumble once again.
He went to work, did tasks that anyone could do, then came home and handled household chores at a level anyone could manage. There were younger, more competent junior employees at his company, and even Kasumi’s cooking was better than his.
Did he even have a purpose?
Sure, if he disappeared now, their current life would fall apart. But Kasumi and Akari, with her blood, would surely rebuild soon.
In fact, their lives might become even richer without him. Kasumi, though busier, would cook genuinely delicious meals filled with love, and Akari would reciprocate by helping with the chores. When he imagined a world without his presence—one without impurities—the thought overwhelmed him with its beauty.
Ryuji couldn’t help but feel that he was nothing more than a poor-quality, replaceable part.
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TL Note: Maybe some of you have seen or even read a short story with this exact title, this is a mini-series version of that short story.